


The Golden Rule

by shujeong



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Beaches, Confessions, Daddy Kink, Dom/sub, Falling In Love, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Meaningless Sex, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:55:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23258776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shujeong/pseuds/shujeong
Summary: It hurts, but the end is actually the new start.
Relationships: Hong Jisoo | Joshua & Yoon Jeonghan, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan
Comments: 4
Kudos: 69





	The Golden Rule

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this in one sitting pls k*ll me and also if ur reading this right now, thank you and i hope you find this to be not worthless. fortunately or unfortunately, the sex isn't detailed (seriously it's not) and mostly mentioned but if u guys want smut, let me know

_“No one could kiss me but you.”_

Joshua wakes up in cold sweat. It keeps happening.

“I still love you.”

💌

They met in an average bar. The night air was chilly but in there, it was all warm bodies. Joshua couldn’t bring himself to dance anymore, instead asking for more drinks from the bartender. But nothing really quenched his thirst, his throat remained dry and scratchy. He came out here on his own like usual, and he’d eventually bring home another man and his bed would shake with the force and he’d feel the transient fix.

Joshua was in no way inclined to love. He may as well have a tattoo on his forehead that said, _no strings attached_. It just made things easier. Love just isn’t for him, because where love goes, pain follows.

“I’m surprised nobody’s snagged you away yet.” A voice said, and the whisper was so close to his ear and he whipped around to see a somewhat ethereal being. “I didn’t want to be.” He replied, haughty. The man before him chuckled, “Why not?”

“Why would I be? Everyone here is a simpleton. I need something new.” Joshua rolled his eyes and picked up his glass to take another shot, slamming it down on the table the next second. The stranger leaned in again to murmur, “I can be that for you.”

And he was— new, that is. Joshua felt like he was in paradise, like if there was a heaven, it would be that night when the other thrusted into him relentlessly. And every night spent with that man.

After the first time, Joshua was being held close, and he spoke in a hushed tone into his neck, “I never caught your name.” A kiss on the forehead. “Jeonghan.”

They eventually exchanged numbers, deciding that, _you know, if ever you need to fuck_. So that was what they always were, just two boys who had sex, lots of it. But it was the moments in between that made Joshua’s heart race miles a minute.

They were texting. It was easy and fun like their sex but Joshua was worried because why does he enjoy talking to him as much as he enjoyed getting fucked by him? This wasn’t supposed to be the case, this wasn’t supposed to happen but it did over and over and over again. He never forgot those dreadful messages, the ones that threatened to slowly tear him apart.

It was why he kept reminding himself that this is just a very long one night stand. An extended fucking session. It was why he kept throwing words around like, _“I should try finding other doms, other daddies.”_ But every single time he did, Jeonghan would answer, _“Oh, but baby, you’ll always come running back.”_ Jeonghan never let him forget that he was the best, that Jeonghan fucked him and took care of him like no one else ever could.

But the messages, those messages that fucked with Joshua’s head. Like an extremely unfortunate lovesick fool, he read them before he slept. Hated and loved the way it made him feel important.

 _“I’m your daddy, baby.”_ but Joshua refused, always did, and replied with, _“You’re everyone’s daddy. Anyone could kiss you.”_ Jeonghan asked him a question instead of being straightforward, _“Would I let them?_ ” Joshua stared at it for a while, setting with, _“I don’t know.”_ The text that followed haunted him, _“No one could kiss me but you.”_

It started there, or maybe it had even before and Joshua didn’t notice because he was too preoccupied with Jeonghan. Every single thought that popped in his head was constantly about him and Joshua wondered if this was what it was like to be _crazy_ about someone. If this is what people would describe as _head over heels_.

Jeonghan repeatedly reminded him that he was his baby, and Joshua once warned him that he should never say _‘my baby’_ or _‘mine’_ because Joshua would become attached to him and neither of them wanted that. But Jeonghan let those words slip his tongue anyway.

Joshua never heard Jeonghan say that he didn’t want feelings, it was just implied. Strongly implied. But then Jeonghan would do things that confused him to no end. He’d get doors for him, comfort him, was his dominant even outside the bedroom, took care of him, kissed him, complimented him, intentionally made him laugh, and worst of all he made him happy and treated him as if he was the only person who mattered. Then Joshua realized he was a simpleton, just like every other person in the bar that night.

Because he fell in love.

~

They took a trip to the beach one day and walked along the shore. Jeonghan held his hand gently and it was a problem because Jeonghan was gentle even when he was rough. Joshua tried to ignore it and pulled away to pick up a rather exquisite shell. He showed it to the other, “Another pretty thing.”

“Another?” Jeonghan asked, going over to Joshua. He shook his head, “You’re prettier.” Joshua smiled slightly, “I don’t think so.” Placing the shell back on the sand, he gave a tiny wave, “Bye pretty shell.” Jeonghan hugged him from behind. “Well, I know so.”

Eventually the sky was dark and the only source of light was one emitted by the moon. They sat down near a tree. Looking up at the celestial body, Joshua muttered out of the blue, “The moon is also really pretty but also so lonely.” He felt Jeonghan tuck stray strands of his hair behind his ear. “The stars accompany her.” Joshua hums, “But she’s in love with the sun. And they never meet.” He turns to face Jeonghan and finally looks into his eyes, “It’s a sad love story, isn’t it?” Jeonghan nodded and sighed as he caressed Joshua’s soft cheek, “An eclipse is rare but it’s beautiful.”

Joshua gave a sigh of his own, “Yeah, wonder what my sun looks like.” A moment passed, “Sorry, it’s a silly thing to say.” Eyes leaving Jeonghan, he looked at the sand and traced it randomly, “What should I draw...?” Jeonghan followed his gaze, “Draw the sun maybe.” At his suggestion, Joshua started with an imperfect circle and then drew squiggly triangles around it for the light rays. When he finished, he couldn’t stop himself from saying, “What if I drew a face instead?”

“Do you have a face for your sun, then?” Joshua laughed but the sound was anything but happy. “No, I won’t have one.”

~

They had sex again and Joshua did something he had never done during it— he cried. But Jeonghan kissed his tears away and would caress him delicately. Joshua didn’t know why but this time felt different. It felt _intimate_ and it was like something was left unsaid.

The following night, they decided to try the indoor pool. Joshua held his breath as they both went under the water at the same time, gasping for air when they came back up. “I don’t know whether to strangle you or give you a kiss.” He furrowed his brows. Jeonghan snickered and carried Joshua by his thighs, kissing his lips. “Kiss is the only answer.” Joshua looked at him as if disgusted, “Yuck.” He scanned their surroundings, “I’ll go look for someone else to kiss.” Jeonghan rolled his eyes and smiled, “You’re not going anywhere.” 

They swam for a bit more, and Joshua stopped to begin staring at the moon again. Jeonghan watched him and slowly approached the younger. Almost cautiously, he cupped Joshua’s face and leaned down to kiss his lips. And Joshua lets go, but just a little bit. He only melts just a little bit. But he really won’t forgive himself if he lets go any further than that. He needs to keep himself on a chain. But his own hand betrays him when he touches Jeonghan’s cheek as they share one of their softest and nearly loving kisses. He’s powerless.

At last, Jeonghan made the final blow. He left the next morning and never came back. The bag Jeonghan brought with him to the resort was gone. There was no trace of him, it was like he was never with Joshua to begin with. Joshua tried everything but he never answered, never picked up, nothing. He didn’t know where Jeonghan lived either, because their escapades were always done at Joshua’s and he didn’t bother finding out where Jeonghan’s house was because Jeonghan was supposed to be _temporary._

But he isn’t.

💌

That was a week ago. Everything came rushing back to him, all the sweet kisses, the tender touches, the fond looks, the affectionate whispers. And suddenly a tear escapes, and another, then another, and he can’t stop crying. Amidst his breakdown, he never heard the doorbell. He scrambles to his bathroom and after what seemed like ages, he came out to go downstairs. Checking the clock on the wall, he saw that an hour had passed. After pouring himself some water, he finally heard the doorbell ring. He put his glass down and went to the front door, revealing a drenched Jeonghan. They stare at each other but Jeonghan breaks the silence and there’s a look in his eyes that Joshua can’t pinpoint.

“I’m sorry I hurt you. If it’s any consolation, I was hurt too, and I had to think things through because I wanted to be sure but I know that’s not an excuse. It’s not an excuse for me to run away and leave you behind. I thought about it day and night, I _know_ now and honestly I would rather get shot if I never told you.”

In this moment, Joshua couldn’t hear anything but Jeonghan’s voice and the drum of his heart. “Told me what…?”

“That I love you,” Joshua searches his eyes and almost wants him to take back what he said because it’s not fair—

“I know it sounds like a lie but it’s _true_ and I will do everything I always have to and for you, but this time I will _mean_ it and I’ll show and prove to you that I do every single day until you believe me. I want to court you, I don’t care that I don’t know if you love me back and I can’t promise that things will be perfect but if I have to suffer sometimes to be with you, to make you feel just how much I adore you, then I will gladly give you my heart. That is… if you’ll accept it...”

And because it’s Jeonghan, Joshua takes a breath even as his chest aches and says, “I never told you either because I wanted to tell you personally but you were never around anymore. I just thought maybe it was better that I never said it. But… I do love you Jeonghan. But we have to do this together if we want us to work out, okay? No more running away.” It was almost painful how he caught the glimmer of hope in Jeonghan’s irises, the hope that was undoubtedly reflected in his own eyes as well.

“Yes, okay.” The older steps forward and reaches out to cup Joshua’s cheek but hesitates, “Sorry, I just, you look so beautiful even if you probably just cried and I want to kiss you so fucking bad. I miss you, baby.” Joshua crosses his arms. “I’m waiting, daddy.”

He sees the way Jeonghan’s eyes widen and not even a second later, he feels his lips against his own, and warm hands on his face. Joshua grasps the hem of the other’s shirt and pulls back just a bit to pant quietly. “I love you,” Jeonghan murmurs, their lips still grazing each other. “I love you too.”

“Also, why were you crying?” Jeonghan questions worriedly. “Had a dream about you.” Joshua explains softly, and he was abruptly pulled into a tight embrace. “From now on, I’ll make you cry out of happiness.”

**Author's Note:**

> hope u found it not worthless. and yeah i meant what i said: if y'all want smut, just hmu


End file.
